Wondering if wife strayed? (011-Q3-Nemo)

Nemo writes, “One of my wife’s close friends cheated on her husband. My wife says she never knew about it. I’m worried my wife is not being truthful with me, because I can’t believe she wouldn’t have known. And now I’m wondering if my wife has strayed, since they often went out together on weekends. Any thoughts?”

Answer (From Podcast Episode 011):

Nemo, it’s not unheard of for good friends to keep secrets from each other. Your wife’s friend cheated, yes, but she may not have felt like sharing this with your wife.

On the other hand, if your wife did know about it and told you she didn’t, that would bother me, too.

But the real concern is your own wife stepping out on you. You shouldn’t assume that (solely from the possibility that she’s protecting her friend’s confidence).

Perhaps object to her continuing to go out on weekends with this particular friend. Your wife should understand your concern, and give you the respect you deserve as her husband. I think that’s reasonable, given the situation.

Thanks for asking, Nemo.

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